There’s been a lot of coverage on the use of smartphones at concerts lately, with a clear divide falling between those who sheath their iPhones in favour of being engulfed in the live music experience, and those who are happy to spend a concert checking out by ‘checking in‘, Instagraming, and filming amateur footage on their small screen.

Musicians have already taken a stand against the army of mobile phones cropping up at their concerts, with Jack WhitePrinceAtoms For Peace, and Yeah Yeah Yeahs being just a handful of those who have gone as far as confiscating the use of smartphones at their shows. More recently, Poland’s Unsound music festival announced it would be putting a “ban on photographs and filming” at this year’s edition, with an aim to “encourage our audience to focus on being in the moment, and not distract others out of that moment.”

The fine folks over at the LA Times Pop & Hiss column wholeheartedly agreed, writing a witty but very enlightening set of “rules of engagement” in a piece entitled The 10 Commandments Of Smartphone Use At Concerts.

Now, The Guardian has published what seems to be a rebuttal, and while there’s no direct reference to the LA Times piece, it’s hard to ignore the parallels between the two’s arguments. While Pop & Hiss are against, The Guardian have taken the difficult stance ‘for’ in an article titled ‘10 reasons it’s OK to use your mobile at a gig.

Why does it bother people so much? And if it’s such a bad thing, why are so many music fans filming, texting and tweeting?,” The Guardian piece begins, before providing 10 arguments in favour of “getting your mobile out at a show.” Only that they’re not really great reasons to use your phone at concerts and seem to miss some of the main points against their use at concerts.

So in the interest of stoking some debate, we’ve decided to put on the gloves and take The Guardian‘s list to task with our own rebuttal of their rebuttal (cue Xzibit meme) by using their very own original points of why it’s OK to use smartphones at concerts against them (cue maniacal laughter). Buckle up, these be fighting words.

1) Things are supposed to be distracting

The Guardian claims that the use of mobile phones is no more intrusive and distracting than “talking, shirtless dancing, sitting on someone’s shoulders, high-pitched whistling or someone behind you singing off-key the wrong words…” Granted, smartphone use is a lot quieter than these other activities, but most of them are simply celebrations of what is actually happening: the performance of live music. Sure, we’ve all been squeezed in far too close proximity to that sweaty enthusiast who’s hollering misshapen lryics as if they were hosannas in the highest, but you can’t fault them for not being in the moment.

The point is also made undone when The Guardian point out: “smartphones also eliminate other intrusive audience behaviours. I mean, who is going to go into a mosh pit with a mobile phone in their hand? Who wants to stage-dive? You might hurt your phone! Or worse, mine.” Sarcasm? Hopefully, but if you’re checking your Facebook feed or racking up points on Candy Crush Saga to block out people who are actively enjoying the concert, well, you’re in the wrong place to begin with.

2) There are worse ways to watch a show

On the topic of the sea of amateur iPhone-ographers that whip out their mobiles to capture the band’s latest single being performed, The Guardian‘s riposte is that festival-sized shows often force distant audience members to take in the show through “giant screens at the side of the stage. At least when I’m watching through a smartphone or tablet, the footage isn’t edited by some cameraman who has a theory about what I want to see during the show.” Wait… so you’d rather watch a smaller, more pixellated view of the back of another punter’s head and listen than be enslaved by the directorial decisions of a high-cost production team? Sure nobody likes too many close-ups of the lead singer and guitar wankery, but surely it’s the lesser of two evils when you’re that far back from the action? You’re entirely right – there are worse ways to watch a show – and it’s through the glowing lensfinder of another gig-goer.

3) It’s not about making a great recording of the event

One common misconception is that people want an excellent recording of the event. But people often film things just to document that they were there.” Two things. You’re not going to ‘document’ anything with the shitty, low-quality, distorted equipment sandwiched into your Galaxy any better than those with more professional equipment can. It’s reason the BBC still bother pouring millions of dollars into capturing the splendour of nature in HD, rather than relying on a team of sherpas with iPhones. If it’s not ‘excellent’, or let’s be realistic – at a stretch, watchable – then why bother ‘documenting’ it in the first place? The Guardian argues that it’s not about making memories but to provide “content for the virtual presentation of self.” If you’re more compulsively worried about showing people that you were there, or it didn’t happen, then you’re not really there at all.

If however, you’re less concerned with proving your cultural cred with your friends and more about capturing a slice of the experience, there’s simply better ways to do it. The likes of soundhalo and Moshcam provide excellent live concert footage and no, they don’t cover every show on the planet, but they do offer a whole lot more than those crummy YouTube videos. It’s these kinds of poor misrepresentation that artists are just as concerned with; sure, not every band can be like Pearl Jam and Wilco, offering official bootlegs to their fans to stem the amount of crappy recordings plastered all over the ‘net, but using our social media addictions to justify obsessively twittering through a live show is no real excuse.

4) It’s a way of communicating with friends

Tweets, Facebook check-ins, texts allow you – newsflash – to communicate with friends, allowing “opportunities for face-to-face interaction that might otherwise be missed.” The Guardian uses music festivals as a primary example, allowing the mobile user to “strike out on their own” without fear that they can never again meet up with their circle of friends. That’s fine, no-one’s enforcing you to use smoke signals and carrier pigeons as the only means to find your mates, but like all good things – use in moderation. You found your mates, awesome, but don’t then wade up the front of the pit and start a circle-jerk of hashtagging. It’s about being there for a live experience, not really making sure that someone else knows you’re there experiencing it.

5) Wish you were here?

The Guardian describes the phenomena of checking in and “broadcasting of one’s presence” at a music performance can: “express the sheer joy that comes from experiencing live music, even if it temporarily takes away from that experience. The phone is a way to have a friend who could not be present have a little slice of the experience. The ‘wish you were here’ isn’t solely showing off – it’s also reaching out.” How thoughtful of you to hold your phone up at the sold-out concert I missed out tickets to so that I can hear the glory of Tame Impala’s ‘Elephant’ pouring in all its psychedelic glory transmitted through your crummy speaker to a much more manageable “slice of the experience.” And an @-tag too!? Really, you shouldn’t have.

6) It’s sometimes the only way to make yourself heard

With loud volumes and the presence of other people, being able to text the person next to you is often the best way to communicate.” Because heaven knows I couldn’t just lean in a little closer and ask you what you’d like from the bar, or alert you to the cute girl beside you in fear of them hearing you over those same “loud volumes.” Silliness.

7) Phone use makes the musicians step it up

The fact that any show is being recorded and shared online means that bands have to come on stage each night with their A game. An artist simply cannot afford to have a bad night,” The Guardian write. “Smartphone recordings make bands aware of putting on the best performance they can at every show.” It’s hard to imagine an artist cowering at the sea of arms with smartphones plastered to them and fret, ‘Oh dear, I’m being judged right now’. If anything, it would simply encourage them to play it up for the cameras, there’s a reason they are the ones up on stage seeking attention with guitar solos, pyrotechnics, and musical tributes to their sexual prowess, and not you. If however you’re pulling out your mobile from boredom as some form of backward protest against the artist’s poor performance, then you’re really missing an opportunity. What if they have a public meltdown, or worse (better) yet cark it!? And you didn’t get that all-important YouTube footage for your 132 subscribers?

8) We all get to have a conversation

Real-life interaction can now be supplemented by digital interaction that can include both people who are present and not present,” posit The Guardian. The argument is that the concert experience is bigger than those people who are actually there, which is a nice sentiment that’s in line with the utopian idea of a concert being about music bringing people together. But then note “the hashtag allows me to read about an event as it is unfolding: I can read the unvetted perspectives of music critics and comedians as I take a break from attending to the music.” It’s a real shame if you solely rely on the 160-character-or-less opinions of others to tell you about what’s happening in front of your very eyes and ears.

9) It alleviates boredom

If the band isn’t entertaining me, why should this bother you?” write The Guardian, debating that those who are irritated by punters thumbing away on their mobiles are “just as narcissistic as the person they are condemning as narcissistic.” Well aside from the distractions (discussed), this line of thinking ignores the third party outside of the mobile user and the non-mobile user – and the entire reason everyone is gathered in one place and (hopefully) directing their attention to the people on stage to begin with: to feel connected, to feel like they’re part of something larger that transcends the individual. That person who’s grumbling at your stubborn refusal to engage with the moment isn’t just asking you to put your phone away, they’re asking you to engage with that collective experience. If that sounds like egocentric pride then you’re clearly at the wrong function.

10) If you really don’t like the band… it’s a surefire way of annoying them!

Alright you got us there, that’s a good reason. Though, call us old-fashioned, but we’ve always preferred a finely edged heckle ourselves. But wait, if you really don’t like the band… remind us why you’re there at all?

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