Lindsay Lohan Sues Pitbull

Actress and walking drug laboratory Lindsay Lohan is suing rapper Pitbull over the use of her name in the lyrics to his song ‘Give Me Everything’. Li-Lo and her lawyer Stephanie Ovadia, are suing the writers of the song for Pitbull’s rather mild rhyme, “Hustlers move aside, so I’m tiptoeing, to keep flowing/I got it locked up like Lindsay Lohan.”

In her lawsuit, filed in the Nassau County Supreme Court, Lohan and her lawyers claim that “the lyrics, by virtue of its wide appeal, condemnation, excoriation, disparaging or defamatory statements by the defendants about the plaintiff are destined to do irreparable harm to the plaintiff.”  Lohan, 25, who laughably claims in court papers to be  ”a professional actor of good repute,” sooked that ‘Give Me Everything’ after its release around the world on March 18 was “destined to do irreparable harm.”

Pitbull, ( real name is Armando Christian Perez); Ne-Yo (Shaffer Chimere Smith Jr. to his Mum; and Nick Van De Wall (aka Afrojack) are named as respondents in the suit, as well as J Records, Sony Music Entertainment and affiliates, RCA Music Group, Polo Grounds Music and affiliates, and Mr. 305 Inc.

Lohan’s lengthy suit makes a litany of complaints against the writers, saying that they have damaged what she argues is a whiter than white reputation – one very removed from the drug hoover boozehound we’ve come to know and love.

Her list of claims includes such pearlers as arguing that the defendants used her name “in a distasteful manner’ and that when the ‘defendants maliciously, wickedly, and contriving to injure the plaintiff, made unwarranted, unauthorized, and unjustified statements about the plaintiff in the aforementioned ‘Song’, defendants advanced their commercial and publicity interests, at the costs of plaintiff’s name,” unjustly enriching themselves.’

Her sooking didn’t stop there though, as she blubbered that they had caused her emotional distress. “That, in addition to, the unwarranted mentioned of plaintiff’s name and personality in named ‘Song’, defendants have portrayed plaintiff in an offensive and disparaging manner in named ‘Song’.”

“That at all times mentioned, plaintiff has undergone tremendous emotional distress that has been intentionally inflicted upon plaintiff by defendants’ unwarranted, unauthorized, and unjustified use of plaintiff’s name and characterization in an offensive and disparaging manner in named ‘Song’. That because of defendants’ visibility in the entertainment industry, their defamatory statements greatly injured the plaintiff in her profession as an entertainer, and caused her great mental anguish and pain.”

Awwww, diddums. Harden the fuck up Li-Lo!